Thursday 22 January 2009

MUCKING OUT



The Beast has been running about building stages at Cafe C , working late and moping about coughing and generally making a big old fuss . Consequently as the sorry state of my fruit bowl apptly demonstrates The Beasts Lair is a manky festering tip slightly untidy.

I shall be spending the evening replenishing provisions nekkid hoovering and flitting about with a duster manfully returning my home to its former opulent splendour.

30 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

The bananas looks soft and overripe. Is that how you like them, Beast?

The Old Tarf said...

Wrinkled oranges and a bruised banana? Reminds me of when you get hit in the family jewels.

I get it subliminal advertising!!

very clever Mr Beast.

Ms Scarlet said...

Ick. Shrivelled. And brown. Put in bin and get fresh.
Sx

KAZ said...

See ....
That's what happens to bananas when you abuse them.
Did Clarice Cliff paint the fruit bowl?

The Mistress said...

Your banana needs protection…

Protect your banana!

No more bruised bananas.

Romeo Morningwood said...

HA! Your arrangement looks like a funny face..see the eyes and a long nose?

Dear Mr Dyson,
For future referencing, it would be quite acceptable for you to keep the nekkid hoovering alerts on a need to know basis.

Thanking you in advance for your kind consideration regarding this matter,
Dr. Cy Klone,
Vortex Weiner Injury and Testicular Re-attachment Clinic

Anonymous said...

something must be in the water ive been cleaningmy penthouse for 2 days now! imergrating finaly cor up with casher! my faithful claner,selfish polih bitch!! ive finished the stage sprayed it black then dusted it with gold gliter it looks so butch :) cafe cunt !

FirstNations said...

What a great, big banana you have! *kaff kaff hack*

HoodChick said...

Doesn't that banana protector look suspiciously like a jock strap without the strap?

Couple of highballs, knock that cough right out.

Anonymous said...

That bowl looks like an enormous ashtray to me... are you clean sparkly now?

BEAST said...

Gorilla Bananas said...
The bananas looks soft and overripe. Is that how you like them, Beast?

No Mr B , thats why it is destined for the bin , the Beast likes em firm and fresh

BEAST said...

The Old Tarf said...
Wrinkled oranges and a bruised banana? Reminds me of when you get hit in the family jewels.

I get it subliminal advertising!!

very clever Mr Beast.

Advertising a flabby wrinkled old banana Mr Tarf , what can you mean

BEAST said...

scarlet-blue said...
Ick. Shrivelled. And brown. Put in bin and get fresh.

Indeed Miss Scarlet , the shrivelled banana has been dispatched

BEAST said...

KAZ said...
See ....
That's what happens to bananas when you abuse them.
Did Clarice Cliff paint the fruit bowl?

It wasn't me Miss Kaz , I am totally inoccent of banana molestation, I think the fruitbowl came from France

BEAST said...

MJ said...
Your banana needs protection…

Protect your banana!

No more bruised bananas.

oh!
my banana isn't bruised Miss MJ its just expired from old age and neglect

BEAST said...

Homo Escapeons said...
HA! Your arrangement looks like a funny face..see the eyes and a long nose?
I thought it looked more like a set of genitals , still we all see something different i suppose
Dear Mr Dyson,
For future referencing, it would be quite acceptable for you to keep the nekkid hoovering alerts on a need to know basis.
The Evil Dr Dyson feels you need to know Mr Coppens , he fully appreciates your need for entertainment on those long canadien winter nights

Thanking you in advance for your kind consideration regarding this matter,
Dr. Cy Klone,
Vortex Weiner Injury and Testicular Re-attachment Clinic

Do you supply call out cover in case of an accident ??

BEAST said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
BEAST said...

FirstNations said...
What a great, big banana you have! *kaff kaff hack*

You have given yourself away with the Liars Cough.
I am fully aware its small , brown and wizened
Lawks!! Ghandi is hiding in my fruit bowl

BEAST said...

HoodChick said...
Doesn't that banana protector look suspiciously like a jock strap without the strap?
Does it ??? blimey

Couple of highballs, knock that cough right out.

I tried that with the ghastly Armenian Brandy Natemare brought back from his holidays , I just ended up with a hangover AND a cough

BEAST said...

mutleythedog said...
That bowl looks like an enormous ashtray to me... are you clean sparkly now?

I am always scared I will drop the blasted thing , The Beasts Lair is now back to its glittering fabulousness

BEAST said...

Anonymous said...
something must be in the water ive been cleaningmy penthouse for 2 days now! imergrating finaly cor up with casher! my faithful claner,selfish polih bitch!! ive finished the stage sprayed it black then dusted it with gold gliter it looks so butch :) cafe cunt !

BEAST said...
chasing Lloyd around with the hoover doesnt really count as cleaning
Good Luck with the first 'Cafe C Presents' tonight :-)
Who is performing again Bonnie Langford ????

eroswings said...

You can still salvage the banana. You're not going to eat the skin. Just use the banana, mash it up in a pancake mix and you'll have banana flavored pancakes!

Daisy said...

take pictures of the nekkid dusting...

xerxes said...

My sea cucumber looks better than your banana. And that's after I've finished with it.

BEAST said...

eroswings said...
You can still salvage the banana. You're not going to eat the skin. Just use the banana, mash it up in a pancake mix and you'll have banana flavored pancakes!

I dont think there is any saving that banana Mr E , it had gone all squishy , so it was a quick chorus of Happy Birthday and in the bin with it

BEAST said...

Daisy said...
take pictures of the nekkid dusting...

I dont want to get a content warning like Miss MJ now do I

BEAST said...

inkspot said...
My sea cucumber looks better than your banana. And that's after I've finished with it.

I never touched the banana your honour , it has lain there unmolested and unloved :-(

Ms Scarlet said...

Can we have a picture of a sea cucumber please... someone.. anyone???
Sx

Ponita in Real Life said...

Squishy bananas are best for baking with, Mr. Beast.... they have the nicest flavour!

If not in pancakes, or a banana bread, or muffins, try mashing it onto bread and have a peanutbutter and banana sandwich.... one of my favourites.

Ms Smack said...

Soft bananas should only be used for smoothies, or making banana bread.

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