Friday, 29 August 2008
BEAST LEARNS TO DO THE SPLITS
Beast has been a busy boy , the usual grind of the day job , and an emergency dash to Cafe C for a kitchen Bitch shift (Frobisher being unavailable as he was having a back, crack and sack wax in readiness for his Spanish Holiday - is anyone else having visions of plucked chickens ??? ) .
Beast bussled into Cafe C , a little dynamo of energy and bonhomie, and promptly skated the full length of the kitchen ending up in a heap half in the sink . A startled and stressed Mr C having just slopped a load of cooking oil on the floor .
After getting a lecture for attention seeking gymnastics and being late , and the restaurant being full of eager diners , gagging for a portion of Mr C's grub , we didn't have any time to do anything about the oil and had to commence service , skating around like Torville and fecking Dean . It was so bad by the sink I had to tie my shoe laces together while I was tackling the huge mound of washing up , as one false move and I would do a sudden and gusset bursting fit of the splits .....Mr C was not amused by all this 'Norman Wisdom' slapstick as the constant muscle tearing induced screams of agony and shattering crockery was spoiling the ambiance for the diners
Beast and polish waitress Gruchenka prepare the order for table 6
My kitchen performance is obviously improving. I only got told off once as my salad garnish was not 'Glamorous' enough for evening service.
Mr C was expecting the salad equivalent of Big Saturday Night Out Hair
Sadly the Beast's first attempt was found wanting............
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