Thursday, 15 May 2008


Here we go the tour of the Beasts living room as promised to Miss FN
Note wood burning stove , 'wipe clean' leather sofa's (Theres another one to the left you cant see) and Miss MJ's favourite rug

Now standing on MJ's rug and facing the back of the house
we have the kitchen diner

Sneaking past the wide screen and into the dining bit

The finally swinging round we have the the kitchen bit.

Now I love this big extended room .It holds some silly happy memories , big family get together's , friends round for dinner and pancake parties .
Mr C and Frobisher made my birthday cake in this very kitchen, ate it all , and went out before I got home , leaving me with the washing up...... ON MY FECKING BIRTHDAY.
Alfie doing a huge squishy turd right next to the bin(bottom right) and somehow managed to knock my mobile phone off the worktop at the same time so that it stuck in the turd like a 99 flake in an ice cream.
Mr C and Frobisher , giggling on the sofa , as Mr C worked Lloyd's mouth like a ventriloquist dummy and told terrible jokes.
Myself and the lovely Jackie giggling in the kitchen, after I got a huge telling off for waking Mr C up by counting spoons in the cutlery drawer and slamming cupboard doors (I wasn't doing either of those things and it was 3 pm in the afternoon !!!!).
Ma Beasties exploding marmalade(we had to scrape it off the ceiling)
Mr C's Jackson Pollock cooking (you had to scrape it off everything).
I shall just sit here , remembering stuff and snickering to myself :-)


Lost said...

Good gawd, what kind of freak are you? Your place is so CLEAN - isn't that against the man code or something? LOL

BEAST said...

Lost , we only pull that sort of mularkey when there's a girl about to clean up after us :-)

FirstNations said...

thats delightful and charming!
really it is!

but i asked for pictures of the

you know, the outdoor place? with the plants?


Lost said...

Oh you are soooo in trouble with the Guy Conspiracy for letting THAT little tidbit out for females to see LOL

FirstNations said...

..but yes, it's very nice, and awfully darned clean.

*casts eye over disasterous kitchen*

look! a ufo!


BEAST said...

Miss FN if you remember you sugested kitchen pictures about 6 weeks ago ,but lazy arse Beast has only just got round to it , now I have given you a tantalising glimpse of the garden through the patio doors , I will do the garden pics next.

***wanders off muttering ***

BEAST said...

Lost . You mean you hadn't worked that out yet ????

Lost said...

And here I was convinced that men had no problems living with empty pizza boxes and dirty socks and drawers all over the place. Hmm the man in my life just may need some retraining. lol

BEAST said...

Yes its clean.
I can also cook
Stuff me clothes in the washer
Do me own shopping
Dress Myself
Hold a polite conversation

Feck I have turned into a GIRL

Anonymous said...

Did you like hide all the garbage and newspapers and empties and shit or don't you have any? Also where do you keep those Russian brides you keep trying to sell me?

MJ said...

It's much less squalid than I expected!

Aside from the gigantic pot plant in the backyard and the crack pipe on the kitchen counter, it almost looks like a normal person's abode.

MJ said...

*strains eyes to see which "For Dummies" book is in Beast's kitchen*

Any guesses from the rest of you?

MJ said...


MJ said...

And why haven't you shown us the room where nothing ever happens?...

Beast's boudoir?


MJ said...

Good to see the banana in a nice fruit bowl, where it belongs, for a change.

Or were you waiting for it to ripen for easier insertion?

Leah said...

So sweet, so un-lair-like! I must admit I love peeping into other people's houses...I mean, not like I roam around doing it, but if it's offered up to one...thanks!

Gorilla Bananas said...

I'd say it was a fitting apartment for James Bond himself. Apart from the fireplace, which isn't big enough to warm a rat's arse.

BEAST said...

Mr Mutley . the Beast is far too busy to make too much mess , I leave a trail of debris at other peoples houses :-). The russian brides are delivered by courier fresh from the russian steps on placement of an order....I can currently offer you a summer buy one get one free special offer ????

Miss MJ . You are rather over excitable and banana fixated today. As you well know The Beast is a model of clean living and healthy eating.
Leah me too , when I am dog sitting , I like taking the dogs for a walk after dark and peering in everybodies lighted living rooms.....some people have hidious taste.

Mr Bananas , Luckily its a house rather than an apartment , so I can make as much noise as I like , without neighbours banging on the walls . The woodburner throws out an awesome amount of heat , given its size , I usually have to turn the rest of the heating off if the burner is on

MJ said...

I'd like to see your underwear drawer.

How many pairs of Sponge Bob boxer shorts do you have?

BEAST said...

Miss MJ thats just a crafty was of finding out if the Beast wears Boxers or briefs . Have you considered that the Beast may go commando and as such doesnt have an underwear drawer.
I am afraid I can confirm or deny NOTHING

MJ said...

All right then.

Show us what's in your handbag.

BEAST said...

Miss MJ I have a MANBAG for my gym and cyling stuff , you can route about in there if you like :-)

MJ said...

I should also like to peek inside your medicine cabinet.

There must be a prescription for Viagra in there.

Just in case you ever get lucky.

*tosses an Odor-Eater into Beast's "MANbag"*

Anonymous said...

... and I like your kettle - no matter what anyone says! I shall do this is a few days - maybe next week!

MJ said...

Your kettle is shite!


its so unerveing for women to see a mans house so clean... good on you man... and is that a pot plant inthe back yard???

MJ said...


Anonymous said...



BEAST said...

Mr M likes the kettle , Miss MJ doesnt.....what can I say.

Mr Voices , I gotta live here , anyone else wants to live in a shit hole for the sake of stereo typing be my guest.

Mr C if supposedly its a gay thang and your the biggest poof in Dorset , AND the untidyist person I ever met.....WHAT HAPPENED ????

MJ said...

These "pancake parties" you speak of...

Were they BANANA pancakes?

BEAST said...

Miss MJ you can have whatever filling you wish in a pancake

MJ said...

I hope you use real Canadian maple syrup.

MJ said...

You haven't dropped by for a visit today.

Where are you today my little petal?

*gives up and flounces off to work*

Ms Smack said...

LOVE that kitchen and the memories that go with it....... :)

MJ said...

Another day passes.


Daisy said...

lovely beast...sorry i came by so is nice to see where others call home...and i am actually (oddly) a fan of that rug!

Liz said...

It is very ... male. But charming.

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