GASTRO PORN - OH YES

I had a marvellous evening , a nice long gym session , a nice dinner followed by two of my favourite chilled evening passtimes.

Firstly volumptuos Nigella Lawson is back on our screens - Hurrah.

Anyone who has had her series of cookery programs refused by an american network as 'Gastro Porn' not suitable for a god fearin familly audience gets the Beasts vote.

Last night season opener didnt dissapiont , Nigella's idea of low fat is to just fry everything in one pound of butter rather than two , she manages to pull off(if you will pardon the expression) a heady feel of nostalgic familly get togethers or chilled dinners with friends and pure animal lust and gluttony, She even managed to close the show with her signature 'cum shot' . Nigella sneaking down to the fridge in the small wee hours , barely contained in her white satin pj's , where upon she sets about a huge portion of leftover croisant caramel pudding and is seen behind the closing credits , Bossom heaving , a look of almost orgasmic delight on her face and double cream dribbling down her chin............

A program best watched alone as lustfully licking the TV screen in polite company is rarely acceptable...........

Its at times like this that one almost loses it completely , and fevered fantasies push to the fore of being tied almost nekkid to the kitchen table with a heaving Nigella , licking lard from your glistening chest while feeding you extra thick double cream donuts lovingly fried in goose fat.

After a short lie down in a darkened room I set about my next favourite thing with renewed vigour , squabbling with Mr C on MSN.........

Squabbling with Mr C is like sparring in karate or like good sex without anyone having to sleep on the wet patch.

It has it all , attack , defence , vile insults , ridiculous posturing , hopes , fears , jokes , threats , 'shouting' in capitals , rude jokes , setting of traps , tantrums and exchange of recipes.

I even saw Frobisher , stomping round in the road brandishing a tire iron and muttering dark oaths under his breath - I think he may have been at the gin again :-)

So all in all I had a good evening.

Nigella's Crispy Crunchy Squid

Squid cut into bite sized rings.

put in a plastic bag and give a good shake to coat with the following

2 tablespoons cornflour

4 table spoons of semolina (for a good bit of crunch)

1 teaspoon salt

1 teasespoon paprika

good grinding black pepper.

Deep fry until brown and crispy , serve with mayo with two cloves of fresh minced garlic stirred in

Yum.