Wednesday, 18 February 2009

GYMTASTIC



The Beast has gone gym crazy again.I have these month(s) long fits of enthusiasm alternated with brief periods of sloth

Give me weights (Free and machines , I am not fussy)

A Swiss ball (More comfortable than a bench for presses and fly's)

A bottle of water (Hydration , Hydration , Hydration)

Some drum' n' bass on my ipod(Or anything With a steady , up tempo beat)

I get all hyperactive and 'superset' (Which is to flit between reps of two or more different exercises with no breaks ) .

My Trainer

***pauses for effect***

Oh did I mention I have a personal trainer once a week - (how Hollywood is that , I can tell y'all are swooning with the glamour of it)

sarcastically refers to my training technique as the ADHD workout - cheeky devil.

What do the rest of you do for exercise , or are you as inactive as Piggy's Gym Membership (Guffaws loudly at the thought of Piggy in salmon pink leotards , head band and leg warmers)

47 comments:

Jimmy Bastard said...

I swear by a good healthy diet, plenty of sit ups daily, and a good workout in the ring at least once a week. Boxing is good for releasing stress and building stamina.

Forget the pain. Pain is merely weakness leaving the body.

MJ said...

I fling my underpants about the room and roll cheese across the border to Ms. Nations.

scarlet-blue said...

So this is where you get to wear your Spandex bodysuits!

I type a lot. My fingers are well exercised.
Sx

Gorilla Bananas said...

You can't beat climbing trees, Beast, but you're obviously short of willpower to get in shape. It might work with Miss Whiplash as your gym instructor.

the dish washer said...

Obviously the Circuit Training was a great success.

Do you mean Drum & BASS

Hahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!

BEAST said...

Jimmy Bastard said...
I swear by a good healthy diet, plenty of sit ups daily, and a good workout in the ring at least once a week. Boxing is good for releasing stress and building stamina.

Forget the pain. Pain is merely weakness leaving the body.
I would love to try boxing , sadly they dont do it at the health centre , I did four years of contact karate and I loved the pad work

BEAST said...

MJ said...
I fling my underpants about the room and roll cheese across the border to Ms. Nations.
A fine workout indeed Miss MJ , will you be making a knickers slinging video so others can join in ???

BEAST said...

scarlet-blue said...
So this is where you get to wear your Spandex bodysuits!

I type a lot. My fingers are well exercised.
Sadly Miss Scarlet , the Beast and Spandex are an unhappy mix , I would look like a haggis in a condom (If you can imagine such a thing )

BEAST said...

Gorilla Bananas said...
You can't beat climbing trees, Beast, but you're obviously short of willpower to get in shape. It might work with Miss Whiplash as your gym instructor.
Climeable trees are in short supply in this area Mr B .
I have no shortage of willpower and 'Hiltler in a Vest' is motivation enough for anyone

BEAST said...

the dish washer said...
Obviously the Circuit Training was a great success.

Do you mean Drum & BASS

Hahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!
Dont you start on my misspellings and typo's as well , I was posting suruptisiously(Yes Yes also misspelt) from work so didnt have a chance to sanity check it

Lippy said...

I need to get one of your enthusiastic fits Beast _ i've been to the gym once since Christmas.

I am aiming as of next week at dog walk plus 1. IE I walk the dog for 40 minutes a day anyway, and ride a couple of times a week. But on the non-riding days I must go to the gym or swim.....I've been saying this for years I know!!!

CyberPete said...

That's you in the photo right?

BEAST said...

Lippy said...
I need to get one of your enthusiastic fits Beast _ i've been to the gym once since Christmas.
Who knows how long it will last Lippy
I am aiming as of next week at dog walk plus 1. IE I walk the dog for 40 minutes a day anyway, and ride a couple of times a week. But on the non-riding days I must go to the gym or swim.....I've been saying this for years I know!!!
Sounds pretty energetic enough anyways , so have a rest and a donut :-)

BEAST said...

CyberPete said...
That's you in the photo right?
Cheeky Monkey
***frowns at Pete ***

CyberPete said...

Sorry. I had to.

I full well know it's Piggy

Ponita said...

I walk the dog, wipe up dog spit, walk the dog, pick up cat fluff, walk the dog, wipe up dog spit.... well, you get the picture.

I also try and get to the pool three times a week, schedule allowing.

I actually dropped a lot of weight walking the dog and can't wait for winter to end (in about four months) so I can go for long brisk walks again without wearing a bloody spacesuit to keep warm.

Then I will be able to ride my bike again too. Plus I have a set of weights in the basement, but they languish right now, just collecting dust. Bad me....

MJ said...

I'll floss your teeth with my g-string if you don't shut it.

inkspot said...

I inhale and I exhale.

Beastie, enough boasting, give us a self-portrait in full gym drag, a big clicky one.

MJ said...

Show us your cellulite.

BEAST said...

CyberPete said...
Sorry. I had to.

I full well know it's Piggy

I am saying nothing

BEAST said...

Ponita said...
I walk the dog, wipe up dog spit, walk the dog, pick up cat fluff, walk the dog, wipe up dog spit.... well, you get the picture.

I also try and get to the pool three times a week, schedule allowing.

I actually dropped a lot of weight walking the dog and can't wait for winter to end (in about four months) so I can go for long brisk walks again without wearing a bloody spacesuit to keep warm.

Then I will be able to ride my bike again too. Plus I have a set of weights in the basement, but they languish right now, just collecting dust. Bad me....

I wish I had a dog to walk Ponita :-(

BEAST said...

MJ said...
I'll floss your teeth with my g-string if you don't shut it.
You would have to catch me first Miss MJ

BEAST said...

inkspot said...
I inhale and I exhale.
As a basis for life , that works for us Inky

Beastie, enough boasting, give us a self-portrait in full gym drag, a big clicky one.

I am not sure if your ready for it Inky , have you got a wide screen PC ???

BEAST said...

MJ said...
Show us your cellulite.
I think thats a girl thing Miss MJ

HoodChick said...

I used to walk the dog about 40 minutes a day, but the weather has been so bad I have not been a very good mommy.

I've been on the elliptical 3 times since the new year. One of those was after catching sight of my naked self in a full length mirror. Holy Cow. Literally.

Daisy said...

sex

BEAST said...

HoodChick said...
I used to walk the dog about 40 minutes a day, but the weather has been so bad I have not been a very good mommy.

I've been on the elliptical 3 times since the new year. One of those was after catching sight of my naked self in a full length mirror. Holy Cow. Literally.

Both great forms of exercise Hoody , soon get it all back on track once your weather improves :-)

BEAST said...

Daisy said...
sex

Daisy , I read somewhere that good sex is equivalent of running ten miles...... Having previously nearly expired on a 6 mile run , I am obviously doing one of the wrong :-)

Tickersoid said...

Free weights me!

I say free....

I stole them actually.

BEAST said...

Tickersoid said...
Free weights me!

I say free....

I stole them actually.
They dont come free'er than that Mr Ticks . Good man

MJ said...

Fatty bum.

MJ said...

Big bottom
Big bottom
Talk about mud flaps
Beast has got ‘em

BEAST said...

****waggles pert backside at MJ****

Leah said...

Good on you!

For exercise I watch my little girl do Tae Kwon Do.

Well, that and I go to the local YMCA and walk the treadmill at a brisk pace while watching sitcoms on the little screen. It's boring, but it works.

Daisy said...

beast...i am not much for running but could give you a go in the other department...maybe...just maybe even teach you about endurance;)

The Old Tarf said...

I lift pints of beer in very heavy crystal glasses.

Piggy and Tazzy said...

You'll always be a fat cunt, trainer or no trainer.

You know it to be so.

We curse your wibbly-wobbly arse.

Don't deny the pies! They need you!

UBERMOUTH said...

Let's KILL MJ.

Don't let on.

:)

BEAST said...

Leah said...
Good on you!

For exercise I watch my little girl do Tae Kwon Do.

Well, that and I go to the local YMCA and walk the treadmill at a brisk pace while watching sitcoms on the little screen. It's boring, but it works.
I like watching TV when I am doing boring cardio , much better than tramping the streets

BEAST said...

Daisy said...
beast...i am not much for running but could give you a go in the other department...maybe...just maybe even teach you about endurance;)
Endurance isnt a problem Miss Daisy , but go out and do a ten mile run and then tell me its ANYTHING like sex

BEAST said...

The Old Tarf said...
I lift pints of beer in very heavy crystal glasses.
Tarf , I hope you do it for at least 20 minutes at a time to get the full aerobic burn

BEAST said...

Piggy and Tazzy said...
You'll always be a fat cunt, trainer or no trainer.
Feck off , I am just big boned

You know it to be so.
La La La La not listening

We curse your wibbly-wobbly arse.
It is pert and perfectly defined

Don't deny the pies! They need you!
What sort of pie ?

BEAST said...

UBERMOUTH said...
Let's KILL MJ.

Don't let on.

:)
We dont want to kill Miss MJ , she keeps the flies off my lunch

Anonymous said...

FirstNations says:
I am currently on the Daisy exercise regimen. I don't know if I'm losing much weight, but I can whistle Dixie and hold a conversation at the same time now!

BEAST said...

Do you whistle with a lisp ???

Chritian said...

@ dishwisher - leave em alone!!

We invented DNB, Drum n Bass, Drum & Bass, eg Hardcore Jungle..

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