Thursday, 17 July 2008
WHAT I DONE THIS WEEK , BY BEAST
I have had a varied week so far , work has been quite busy , and then I was summoned for a 'galley slave' shift in the kitchens of Cafe C , toiling under (o'er) head Chef Mr C.
The 'Galley slave' job spec is general service prep , preparing salad stuff , veg and garnish(pictured left Beast preparing fresh local produce 'a little road kill goes a long way) , washing up etc etc .Once service starts its a bit like being a operating theatre nurse to Mr C's star surgical consultant . I am there to produce the required crockery , implements , food stuffs , garnish , vegetables etc etc immediatley on his barked commands
"TONGS , Dont stand there gawping , now means NOW , I don't pay you to think Beast" he snaps as Beast tugs his forelock proffering Mr C's special gold plated vegetable tongs , pausing briefly to mop the star performers brow as he sweats decorously with the effort of creating his culinary masterpieces.
As soon as the last meal exits the kitchen , Mr C majestically sweeps out , with a 'dismissive clean this place up Beast , its a mess' , leaving me with the washing up , kitchen clean down , more washing up , floor mopping , even more washing up (You get the picture ,washing up features very heavily)
Frobisher was working front of house and had dressed to impress , cutting a dashing figure , gliding about the restaurant , dispensing drinks and the occasional lap dance for Cafe C's discerning patrons(A party of caterwauling ,libidinous menopausal schoolteachers). He was visible flagging towards the end of service having to drag around underpants filled with loose change .'Tips for a five star service' he haughtily wheezes , jiggling his undies.... the Beast cant help noticing the Wages of Sin play havoc with ones nicker elastic !
Next evening I had booked a shoulder re adjustment with 'crusher' Phil , who seems to enjoy the inflicting of pain a little too much .He cheerily informs me that the next procedure may be a little uncomfortable and then chortles loudly when he invokes a muffle scream of pain followed by much cursing from the poor Beast.
A bruised and broken Beast is now 'resting' for a couple of days , at least until I get full use of my arm back :-)
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