Thursday, 8 November 2007
I love this time of year , the crisp air , the beautiful colours , falling leaves swirling in the breeze like snow and the satisfying crunchy walks thru the resulting leaf drifts. Bonfires , roaring log fires , roasted chestnuts and comfort food dinners . You just cant beat it.
However the spector of past autumnal childhood embarrasments hover on the periphery of the conciousness , howling for attention.When I was a kid , just started school for the autumn term Ma Beasty had a domestic goddess/earth mother fit and knitted me the most hidious mittens that were attached to a string and threaded thru the arms of my coat (so you dont lose them sweetie) and joy of joys a matching hat........ with a bobble on it.
They looked like they had been knitted from half digested muesli.
The hat made me look like my head had half melted.
It was tantamount to child abuse in my book...... and we have had words about it since. I mean why not just make your child walk around with a big sign on their back saying please bully this child . Luckily my older brother went to the same school and has always had the demenour of a hung over rotweiler with piles.......so I escaped pretty lightly on the bullying front.
I did eventually persuade our pet German Shepperd Karla to eat the hat and bury the mittens.......I loved that dog :-).
Which leads me into that old chestnut Porn star names...... I think mine is pretty good , the formula being your first pets name and your mothers maiden name
So ladies and gentlemen may i present , the pnuematic and pouting Miss Karla Knobs.
Now fess up whats yours
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