Wednesday 25 June 2008

IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED........

Yes ok ANOTHER garden post , Itsnot my fault Miss Nations made me do it , I can just hear Miss MJ chewing on her gusset in frustration. But this is a gardening post with a difference
1..I am rubbish at gardening
2.I can't work my camera phone
3.I am rubbish at photography composition etc

I realise I ran out in a flap , snapped 12 pictures , lost 8 of them an ended up with theses 4 that give you no idea whatso ever of the overall look of the garden.

Now its got dark so I can't remedy the situation.
I dont know any of the plant names except the bamboo's and roses.
Just look at the crap pictures and comment as you will :-)











































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See , the garden needs a bit more work and the pictures are rubbish.
So to complete the post title.
LOWER YOUR EXPECTATIONS :-)))

33 comments:

The Mistress said...

Eat my gusset.

Lost said...

Damn I didn't even realize some of that stuff grew in britain. Who'da thought it?

Leah said...

Looks like an eden to me; all we've got out back is a square foot of dirt containing several generations of dead hamsters and maybe someone's dad's ashes...

Gorilla Bananas said...

I can't see anything wrong with that garden. I bet it's bushier and lusher than mj's gusset, although it possibly has fewer hiding places. A good place to get down on all fours and thump your chest.

BEAST said...

MJ said...
Eat my gusset.
ewwwwww its all soggy

BEAST said...

Lost said...
Damn I didn't even realize some of that stuff grew in britain. Who'da thought it?

Indeed Miss Lost , niether did I , and yet it is there , growing and stuff

BEAST said...

Leah said...
Looks like an eden to me; all we've got out back is a square foot of dirt containing several generations of dead hamsters and maybe someone's dad's ashes...

Sounds lovely , are the dead hamsters a design statement ?

BEAST said...

Gorilla Bananas said...
I can't see anything wrong with that garden. I bet it's bushier and lusher than mj's gusset, although it possibly has fewer hiding places. A good place to get down on all fours and thump your chest.
It lacks things to swing from Mr B.
We shall draw a discreet veil over Miss MJ's gusset , one doesn't discuss such things in polite company , however it does keep the flies off the cucumber sandwiches

Anonymous said...

Those little pink flowers are called Silent Death and are fatally poisonous!! Get rubber gloves and a mask, soak them in lighter fuel and burn them!! Then did out the roots and cover an area about 5 square metres around in weedkiller.

See! I have probably saved your life with my great advice!!

BEAST said...

mutleythedog said...
Those little pink flowers are called Silent Death and are fatally poisonous!! Get rubber gloves and a mask, soak them in lighter fuel and burn them!! Then did out the roots and cover an area about 5 square metres around in weedkiller.

See! I have probably saved your life with my great advice!!

How alarming Mr M ,That explains the dead postman , maybe it time to try out that Army surplus Flame Thrower Miss FN kindly sent me for my birthday , I was saving it for Ma Beasties Summer BBQ , but hell needs must when the devil drives

Andrea said...

lots of nice bamboo beast!

Daisy said...

you need a bench in your garden to enjoy...i would come over and read on the odd day (if it was padded :)

UBERMOUTH said...

Those are nice pics! Now convince Mutts to take pics of his allotment( so we will know where to pilpher from)....don't tell him the whys and wherefores though.

Romeo Morningwood said...

You're talking about the picture of the actual garden POST right?
Oh yes, it's quite lovely.

BEAST said...

Lippy said...
lots of nice bamboo beast!
indeed Miss lippy , there may be the odd panda lurking about in the denser parts

BEAST said...

Daisy said...
you need a bench in your garden to enjoy...i would come over and read on the odd day (if it was padded :)
I see you more as a chaise longue style lounger person Miss Daisy , cocktail in hand , wiggling perfectly manicured toes in the sun :-)

BEAST said...

UBERMOUTH said...
Those are nice pics! Now convince Mutts to take pics of his allotment( so we will know where to pilpher from)....don't tell him the whys and wherefores though.

I reckons Mr Mutley is growing all manner of illegal substances on his allotment , or has a pornographic topiary garden thats why he won't take pics Miss Uber

Anonymous said...

Hoy!!

I am trying to work out how to get photoes from my exciting new camera phone onto the computer.....no one seems to know. :-(

BEAST said...

Donnnnn said...
You're talking about the picture of the actual garden POST right?
Oh yes, it's quite lovely.

Why thank you Donn , I have a proliferation of 'posts' in my garden , they are actually upended railway sleepers , one of Mr C's flights of fancy when designing the garden , I was just expecting a few geraniums and stuff

Daisy said...

oh beast...i wish...i don't know if i could sit long enough for all of that luxury...however i do like to be fed grapes...

BEAST said...

Mr Mutts , I just plug my phone in to the PC then open up the F: drive and drag and drop , it says its trying to load some software to do it that always fails , but the drag and drop thing seems to work :-)

BEAST said...

Daisy , there is no value in peeling grapes , all effort and little reward , can I interest you in a mango ???

The Mistress said...

See that rake on the ground in the bottom pic?

That's an accident waiting to happen.

BEAST said...

MJ said...
See that rake on the ground in the bottom pic?

That's an accident waiting to happen.

Thank you for pointing that out Miss MJ
***carelessly drops banana skin****

INNER VOICES said...

great pics and nice garden man!!! so what did you do with the um... other plants?!?!?

*sniffs around looking for "other plants"*

BEAST said...

Mr Voices if your alluding to illegal other plants , you wont find any of those in the Beasts household
The Beast is unfashionably anti drugs of any stripe (except tobacco to which I am a hopeless hypocrite addict :-) )

Newforestandy said...

Dont faint...... I have been let out for the weekend (for good behaviour)!!! May I ask when do they start laying the rails on the sleepers? There maybe a problem as I dont think anything will be able to run on the track anyway. Nice to see your bush tho, I think it could do with a trim. (of course meaning the plants)

BEAST said...

Well , well , well . Look he just crept out of the forest.
Nice to here from you Mr NFA . I hope you and Mr Steve are both well.
I may get down to a bit of bush trimming this weekend , if the mood takes me :-)

FirstNations said...

why do you have a green sleeping bag in your garden? are winos camping there? did the solar glow boobs attract them? are you regretting the purchase of wino attracting solar glow boobs now?


try again.

Love, The Merciless Twat

BEAST said...

Thatsleeping bag , is Miss MJ 'on holiday' . Obviously she is not allowed in the house

Daisy said...

beast...i never said you had to peel them...just feed them to me...but mangos work too...i'm not easy but i am amicable :)

The Mistress said...

The least you could do is throw a canopy over me in intrepid weather.

So much for pleasant holiday accommodations.

Bournemouth is not all is cracked up to be.

BEAST said...

Salacious Saturday at The Beasts :-)

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