Friday, 11 January 2008

SKID ROW


I know Mr C explained painstakingly to me why it was a good idea of mine for him to take my car , while his is in the garage. As I was stomping the 2 miles home in the pouring rain , I seemed to be having a problem remembering suggesting it in the first place and exactly why it was a good idea..... I must be going senile . However as the rain soaked in thru the layers , my mind began to wander , and I was just thinking that you dont see much dog crap around these days , when suddenly I skidded off down the hill on the biggest dog turd you EVER saw. Nearly broke my frigging neck , funny how the powers that run the universe think this sort of coincidence is amusing.

***scraping shoe and retching***






Now another strange thing. I looked in my pictures , and look what I found peeping out at me ,this treasure , titled PIGGY. I have never seen this picture before in my life!! .
Could our very own Piggy have broken into my computer and left it for me ????
The little monkey

25 comments:

Gorilla Bananas said...

Aren't dog owners supposed to scoop it up? Rub it into their faces if they don't. The guy in the picture looks like an adult baby. It's a common fetish, especially among senior judges.

Frobisher said...

Glad to see your getting your come-uppance ;)

It has prop. a human turd knowing your neighbourhood

none said...

If you stepped in two piles you could ski home.

Newforestandy said...

Maybe it was purposefully deposited for you to slip on so that you would be injured then somebody could claim your life insurance? Its one way to pay off those debts!

I see, by the photo, that Derek, the nappy man, has left his photo on your PC

Anonymous said...

I am sorry about the turd.. OK. I dont want to talk about it anymore..

On a lighter note, have you noticed that dog turds dont turn white anymore? Thats because dog food used to be about 80% bone meal - which passed straight through and bleached in the sun...

The Mistress said...

It was Piggy who left that deposit...not a dog.

BEAST said...

Gorilla Bananas said...
Aren't dog owners supposed to scoop it up? Rub it into their faces if they don't. The guy in the picture looks like an adult baby. It's a common fetish, especially among senior judges.

They are supposed to scoop and bag it Mr B, but as further comments unfold the guilty party reveals himself

BEAST said...

Frobisher said...
Glad to see your getting your come-uppance ;)

It has prop. a human turd knowing your neighbourhood


We cant all live in chi chi Holdehurst Village MR F....your beginning to sound just like Giles

BEAST said...

Hammer said...
If you stepped in two piles you could ski home.

Its a thought Mr H , we could have invented a new green travel oppertunity'

BEAST said...

Newforestandy said...
Maybe it was purposefully deposited for you to slip on so that you would be injured then somebody could claim your life insurance? Its one way to pay off those debts!

I see, by the photo, that Derek, the nappy man, has left his photo on your PC

Read on Mr NFA , Mr Mutleys has claimed responsibility for thisdreadful act of 'terrorism'

BEAST said...

mutleythedog said...
I am sorry about the turd.. OK. I dont want to talk about it anymore..
did you have dinner at Miss Mus again ??

On a lighter note, have you noticed that dog turds dont turn white anymore? Thats because dog food used to be about 80% bone meal - which passed straight through and bleached in the sun...
Your so clever Mr M , with facts like this at your fingertips , I cant imagine why your not deluged with dinner party invites :-)

BEAST said...

MJ said...
It was Piggy who left that deposit...not a dog.

It was too large a deposit for wee piggy , so we will just blame him for the photo....for now

Daisy said...

at least it was pouring down rain and you could clean your shoes prior to walking in the house...:)

BEAST said...

Daisy said...
at least it was pouring down rain and you could clean your shoes prior to walking in the house...:)
Thats a positive way of looking at it Daisy , I was more of a mind to dance about and curse whatever god was having his evil way with me

Tickersoid said...

I once tripped on an uneven surface and gashed my toe (wearing flip flops at the time). As I stumbled to recover, my next step had me plunge the bleeding toe into a steaming pile of dog poo.

I'm starting to get nostalgic about white dog poo. Haven't seen it for years.

Daisy said...

ah beast then you were able to dance in the rain...how wonderful...i should have been with you i know a few rainsteps myself and we would have had a grand time!!!!

Daisy said...

yes i am trying to turn your attitude around a little...don't sweat the small shit...even if it is on your shoes, my friend

BEAST said...

Ticks that will teach you to waer flip flops :-)

Daisy , a moist beast would have a trick or two up his sleeve that could probably make you blush :-)

Daisy said...

beast...i would love to blush with a wet beast...omg i did not just say that in type did i?

BEAST said...

HA HA HA.... but i bet it made you smile :-)

Daisy said...

still am beast...still am...

thank you...

Anonymous said...

It could have been worse... it could have been a lion or a tiger poo, or a baboon...

BEAST said...

Mr M are there lions , tigers and baboons creeping about the darkened streets of Bournemouth

****peers about nervously****

I shall make sure I go out with a chair and a whip in future

Newforestandy said...

I thought you always went out with a whip?

BEAST said...

Only when I am going to the supermarket Mr NFA......theres monsters roaming the aisles

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