OLD DOG , NEW TRICKS

The Beast has been a' pondering.

Comments have been made by a close friend that I never speak much about myself .

I don't know what they mean.

So I asked my mate Lady Muck if she thought this was true and she said enigmatically 'Well you don't give much away!'.

Harumph , so that cleared that up then !

So I pondered on this , and have come to the conclusion everyone is getting confused. If I was meant to emote or ejaculate 'feelings' at the drop of the hat or worse hold a spirited discussion on soft furnishings/fluffy kittens

I WOULD HAVE BEEN BORN A GIRL !.

The Beast is yearning for a simpler life .In times gone past all that would have been expected is to wander about , grunting a bit and trying not to catch your bits on the brambles , wallop anything that took your fancy and drag it back to The Beast Liar(I understand this is now called FOREPLAY) , where you would either stuff it in the oven , or just plain stuff it .

If you bumped into a primordial Jungle Jane or First Nations you could well find yourself on the receiving end of a bit of 'foreplay' (That's called NATURAL SELECTION).

Now I obviously need tips before I venture into the tricky waters of 'sharing' or I will soon be dashed against the rocks of 'inappropriate behaviour' or impaled on the dreaded 'sharing too much ' and sunk without trace.

Consider this a bit of therapy!