Tuesday, 2 November 2010

WHEELS WITHIN WHEELS

The Beast has eyes and ears everywhere and is aware of the unholy alliances being formed to attempt to waylay the Freaking Green Elf Shorts from reaching their rightful master.
 Miss Scarlet , a blogeress from darkest Devon appears to be at the centre of the axis of evil.
I submit the following surviellance photos into eveidence
1. Miss Scarlet conspires with notorius international agitator and Madonna fan ,Petra of Denmark

Notice Miss Scarlet sending secret messages to her watching minions by flashing semaphore with her tartan knickers

2. Miss Scarlet takes a secret meeting with Canadian Floozie and fellow FGES covetor Miss MJ
Notice the symbol for super secret crime organisation Spinchter on the wall behind Miss Scarlet.
Miss MJ (Code Name Infomaniac) is rumoured to be the insane mastermind behind this cartel of criminality and smutt . Its tendrils are believed to penetrate the very fabric of modern society from Aviation
(Infomaniac Air) , the arts (The Infomaniac Dancers) and liesure (The Infomanic House of Beauty) etc etc.
Only a  finely honed Beast  stands alone against this gathering storm


Pick your side and your reason dear reader and hang the consequences

28 comments:

MJ said...

What utter poppycock!

Miss Scarlet and I shall repair to the Infomaniac Diner for a restorative beverage followed by retail therapy on the Infomaniac Shopping Network.

MJ said...

Might I add that it is going to take a LOT of therapy to rid myself of the Cropper image.

Princess said...

In that last pic Mr Beastie, what is it you are sanding on? For little beastie does'nt look like he's paying much Attention at all...

eroswings said...

I shall be like Switzerland and remain neutral, keep making watches and chocolate, and welcome the arrival of the singing Von Trapps and their ilk.

xl said...

I am a slavish, yet ineffectual, devotee of Miss Scarlet and Mistress MJ.

Donn Escapeons said...

As the Aircraft Carrier captain in 'Hunt for Red October' said, "this business will get ugly and this will get out of control."

Had I known the shorts would impel others to resort to such shenanigans, I would have just kept them in my pyjama drawer. If anything happens to you, I'll never forgive mysel..I'll never forgive them!

Roses said...

It's not paranoia if they're really out to get you eh?

I hate to tell you this, but you're out classed here. You should just give up now.

BEAST said...

MJ 1 & 2 : We would expect you to say something of the sort , why dont you relax in your secret lair , settle down in your futuristic swivel chair and stroke your exotic pussy.....you know you want to.
Princess . Its all a front to lure Miss's MJ and Scarlet into a false sense of security.
Mr Eros . If the Von Infomaniac singers turn up you know you have been infiltrated.....oooher.
XL . Fluff those pillows with care , if you upset Miss MJ it could be the old hidden trapdoor into the hidden sharkpool secreted beneath the plaid room....can we interest you in becoming a double agent ???
Donn . We at Beastbite are more than a match for anything that Miss MJ and Scarlet can throw at us. worry not.
Roses . Outclassed . Nonsense , they are only girls :-))
***runs off dodging a hail of shoes and accesories***

Scarlet Blue said...

...You will be no match for my elegant flange thrower...
I hasten to add that I never use 'ugly' plans, Mr Coppens, they are always executed on the finest silk with exquisite embroidery before being put into action.
Sx

Scarlet Blue said...

...forgot to tick the box...
Sx

MJ said...

I've a mind to pick up those pink rubber gloves of yours and wave them maniacally in your rubber-glove-phobic face.

FirstNations said...

I come down definitely and without reservation on the side of all those right thinking individuals who would thwart THE BEAST. As this is the only time you will ever see me coming down on the right side of anything all you 'Swissies' would do well to take heed. *fires up harley, loads shotgun, gnaws haunch of dog hungrily*

Scarlet Blue said...

....You don't stand a chance, Mr Beastie!!!!
Sx

BEAST said...

Lets have a status check.
I come from Margate which makes me ethnic
I am all alone in my house which makes me a minority
and looking after Mr C's temporarily orphaned dogs , budgies , chickens and paraquets which makes me a single mother

Instead of showering me with social benefits and having Beast History days and stuff , you foul lot are victimising an ethnic minority single mother.
I hope your thoroughly ashamed of yourselves!
The Sarah Palins of blogging the lot of you

***shakes head mournfully and continues breastfeeding the chickens ***

Roses said...

'breast feeding the chickens'?

Honey, your reality check bounced.

*runs off laughing hysterically*

xl said...

Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
The FGES and Plot...

Scarlet Blue said...

Shhhh, Mr XL, don't spoil the surprise...
Sx

BEAST said...

So to recap
Roses is hysterical

XL is leaking

and Miss Scarlet is about to explode in the FGES

did I get that right ??

MJ said...

And I've placed Spider Woman in your Shorts.

MJ said...

p.s. Mavis finally posted something new.

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Do you have a couple of spare clothes pegs, Beast? I want to hang these consequences but they keep blowing off the line.

Roses said...

No change there honey.

Champagne? Or vodka?

63mago said...

All I can say is "feet" and sorry, Mr. Beast.

MJ said...

Thank you, Mago.

MJ said...

And XL.

MJ said...

Remember that Ms. Nations is armed, Beast.

And rides a Harley!

FirstNations said...

*too busy donating breast milk to care*

63mago said...

GAwk

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