Tuesday, 23 November 2010

WOT I DID ON MY DAY OFF BY BEAST

On saturday we were all going on a day trip to Jersey   one of the chanel islands that is unfortunatley close to France.  As we all gathered at Cafe C, Frobisher was locked in lavatory refusing to come as he felt a bit rough.
We left , his  wailings and gnashings echoeing around an empty Cafe.
Where upon we Rushed to Weymouth and boarded the luxury fast catamaran to all points west

The captain and horny handed sailor types , cast off  , pointed the sharp end at France and powered up the engines ,  as we set about a hearty breakfast in the restaurant.
As we speeded away from the motherland ,  Dolphins and errr cows frollicked in the wake
Actually I made up the cows , but there were dolphins  , which was so exciting.
As the captain chirpily promised , the  3 hour crossing was a little choppy and we all felt a little queasy , but everyone heroically managed to keep the breakfast down.

We arrived in Jersey and sallied forth to the nearest Cafe  ,where we  had a spirited arguement about what to do with our 4 hours ashore

Sista C won with his suggestion of going to the zoo.
Altho there was initial dissent  it was magically unanimously supported once he threatened to report all of us for attempting to smuggle drugs on the return journey . There is much to be said for the power of prayer.

The Zoo was rather cool.
My particular favourites were

1.The Infomaniac sponsored fruit bat pavilion . The bats were like little insectile dogs ,they came creeping accross there rope bridges to have a good look at us when we came to the viewing window I like to think I am regarded as a god by this particular species as it was obviously me they wanted to see.


2.The Gorilla enclosure . This was very cool indeed , you got so close to them and got a real sense of their power and strange human similarities I could have stayed there all day.

Unfortunatley , there were no dugongs

Eventaully we raced back to the port and boarded the catamaran for the return journey to Weymouth . Once again the captain chirpilly informed us it was going to be a 'lively' crossing , but as I had been necking seasick pills I downed a hearty dinner, chain smoked duty free fags and quaffed a foaming mug of cuppacino in the howling gale on the aft deck for most of the voyage.
Some of our party did not fare so well ,  Janes digestive tract rebelled  about an hour into the crossing as we bounced and rolled past Guernsey

There is an old saying
'Worse things happen at sea'
I am afraid poor Jane proved this to be the case :-(

9 comments:

Princess said...

The poor old thing looks like you just "Done 'er'.
And you found the official Flying Peni... Well done.
What lovely field trip...
Thank you Mr Beastie.
The gorrilla I think says it for all of us really...

xl said...

Oh, I got seasick on the way over! You will have to leave me with the Frenchies. [blurgh]

MJ said...

Do you have a problem with the French?

Unfortunately I do not have time to linger here as I am preparing for a trip to Montreal.

Thank you and good night.

Scarlet Blue said...

Tut... I know about those horny handed sailor types with pointed sharp ends.
Tut.
Sx

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Judging by that photo of the fruit bat, perhaps you weren't regarded so much as a god as an easy lay?

Roses said...

I'm so jealous, I've always wanted to go to the Jersey Wildlife Trust.

You know, proportionally, that fruit bat is hung like...a donkey.

FirstNations said...

here was me thinking that fruitbats couldn't get it up for a girlie. that one certainly looks happy to see me...or somebody...

*coin drops*

*slinks away*

MJ said...

You are mentioned on Miss Janey's blog...

http://missjaneys.blogspot.com/

eroswings said...

You should take some ginger the next time you're on sea journey! That's ginger ale, not the redheads--although they would make for a pleasant journey, too.

The zoo sounds like fun! I luv looking at the wildlife. At the very least, the ones at the zoo fill me with wonder. The incompetent animals I work with at the office, however, are a whole other story.

About Me

My photo
Doing Other Stuff for a while.Mail /MSN messenger on beastch@hotmail.co.uk...COME AND SAY HELLO GO ON YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO