Thursday, 5 May 2011

CLUEDO

A hinous crime has been committed at The Beasts Lair .
Remember this

The FGES were left, gently airing on the clothes line to remove the fecund aroma of colonials   that even a boil wash and spirited scrubbing would not remove.
I returned from a hard day at work , to be confronted with this





If I were a Cluedo playing man (Which I am not as its a tedious load of old knackers) I would be guessing at
Miss Scarlet
In the Garden
With a clothes peg.

The thieving baggage has had it away with the sainted shorts and fingered an innocent into the bargain.
I blame the influence of Miss MJ  !

54 comments:

xl said...

Oh, dear.

Roses is supposedly "in London." Red herring?

BEAST said...

One thing is for sure Mr Xl some theivin minx has been knicker knicking !

Scarlet Blue said...

**Mad pantomime cackle**
It wasn't me. Honest.
Sx

BEAST said...

Hmmmmmmm

Scarlet Blue said...

For one thing, I don't drip.
Sx

63mago said...

I never believed this story of Roses being neatly tucked in a London hotel room alone ...

MJ said...

I don't drip even though I'm rather moist.

xl said...

My drip cleared up about two weeks ago.

CyberPete said...

Well, don't look at me! I have been in New York and just returned yesterday.

Roses said...

*shocked gasp*

How dare I be accused of this heineous crime?

I can prove I was in London and only London. I have my receipts and travel documents.

Mago, I was only alone because you declined to join me. But you know what, I'm not going to go on about it....

CyberPete said...

It's curious that Roses declined to go to New York with me, and then the Shorts end up missing.

Curious.

BEAST said...

Poor innocent Roses .
I suspect the handiwork of a devious criminal mastermind

63mago said...

Pete may have a point there ...

Rog said...

Just a thought:

http://www.justgiving.com/kazblog

Thanks!

Rog

MJ said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BEAST!!!

xl said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR BEAST!

Inexplicable DeVice said...

Happy birthday, Beast!

Scarlet Blue said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MR BEASTIE!!!!
SXXXXXX

Roses said...

Happy Birthday...yet again. I can't help myself.

Happy Happy!

Princess said...

Happy Birthday Mr Beastie...
Is your beadazzler working yet?

63mago said...

Happy Birthday, Mr. Beast.

I'm sorry for being a bit late.

CyberPete said...

So, what's happening with those Shorts?

Christ, it feels like you've held onto them longer than I did.

BEAST said...

Dont be ridiculous Pete :-)

MJ said...

Oh for heaven's sake, Petra.

CyberPete said...

I'm serious!

Get your arse in gear Beastie.

MJ: For heaven's sake MJ!

FirstNations said...

FGES thievery: yet another reason the Pilgrims left England. WHATS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE???????

By the way, Beast, I answered your email, only not using the more recent 'Washington News Flash' msg. I used the previous message to keep the thread established. And now you have *snif* forsaken me. Or was the vehement 'download' too much for ya? Too bad. *flounces off wearing elf shorts in FREEDOM*

BEAST said...

I was temporarily rendered incapable by a lightning attack of man flu . I have to say it wasnt the man flu as such that temporarily silenced me . It was the hours of grandstanding on Facebook fighting off Mr C's and Tazzy's laughable claims that their man flu was worse than mine . It was exhausting .
Anyways Petulant Petra ....the shorts have been knicked OR DID YOU NOT RED THE POST tsk tsk so who knows where they will surface next.
Ms Nations , I have replied **wink** ***wink**

BEAST said...

*READ not RED

MJ said...

You and Mr. Frobisher and Tazzy discussing ManFlu...

It's ALMOST enough to make me want to join Facebook.

First Nations RULES!

BEAST said...

Miss MJ . Me, MR C and Tazzy.
Mr Frobisher is probably far too ill with various ailments to comment on facebook

Miss Scarlet said...

That's right, leave me out... pffffttt... I am just part of everybody's wallpaper. A wallflower even...
Sx

Miss Scarlet said...

**goes off in a major sulk of non-importance**
Sx

BEAST said...

Was that Miss Scarlet flouncing out ?

Miss Scarlet said...

YES.
Sx

63mago said...

So you finally deserted to fackbook?

63mago said...

Ms Scarlet saied "Gusset Gusset Gusset" and you failed to show up!

Roses said...

*sigh*

Bored now.

Get the fuck off Facebook and blog.

MJ said...

Do you even CARE about us anymore?

Miss Scarlet said...

I propose an invasion of Mr Beastie's lair. I propose an artistic arrangement of well stitched elasticated gussets to be stretched taut from the funhouse mirror in the garden, through the living room [where that strange rug resides] and finishing somewhere in the bedroom, possibly hooked over a bed post.
Let's watch Mr Beastie trip over his own well worn gussets.
Sx

MJ said...

Brilliant!

Yet could he not turn it into a gusset catapult and use it against us?

Miss Scarlet said...

We have nothing to fear. We will do it when he is sleeping soundly; he will awake unaware of our actions and will bounce out of bed straight into our ingenious contraption. This is how Mr Beastie will spend his final days, by being eaten by a gusset monster.
Sx

MJ said...

I suggest we moisten the gussets first to increase the ewww factor.

We'll spray them from the water bottle he uses for ironing his Batman outfit.

He won't know the difference.

Miss Scarlet said...

What about Miss Nations canon? Has she left it laying around here.
Do you think we can work it if she doesn't show up?
Sx

MJ said...

We could Ms. Nation's bra.

Have you seen the size of the cups?

Miss Scarlet said...

Ms Nations bra may give us the extra support we need. We could easily wrap Mr Beastie's head in it... eventually he will become mummified in gussets and bra cups... we may need some French lace from Milton Keynes to finish him off.
Sx

MJ said...

Perfect.

What's that girly sort of store in England (not Laura Ashley) where they sell feminine prints?

We'll need a shopping trip there as well.

Miss Scarlet said...

Cath Kidston! Indeed, a Provence Rose Duvet cover drenched in Yardly Lavender water would be useful.
Sx

MJ said...

That would make a nice change from his Sponge Bob duvet, wouldn't it?

I'll have to ask you to do the shopping, Miss Scarlet.

Cath Kidston hasn't made it over this side of The Pond yet.

FirstNations said...

one of my bras would be more than enough to capture beast, mr. c, the lesbian vicar and several transvestites. but what do we want with them, really?
it's all very existential like that.

Miss Scarlet said...

That's a good point, because we would have to feed them and stuff wouldn't we?
Sx

MJ said...

Thank you, Ms. Nations.

I’ve found the perfect English Rose Bath Hat for Beast at that Cath Kidston shop.

Miss Scarlet said...

If Mr Beastie doesn't want it then I may get it for myself....
Sx

MJ said...

Your doppelgänger is on Infomaniac!!!

Lippy said...

Good heavens ....you slip away for a while and look what happens....

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